While writing the story of how I got into acting, I mentioned that I began 2018 with a seven-day fast. This spoken word performance took place at the end of that fast, which was in protest against the two years of abuse I’d been subject to by that point.
I’m getting annoyed with all this trite ‘love yourself’ stuff in the air these days. One hears it all the time, like propaganda in a one party state of mind. Who doesn’t act in their own self-interest? so, I’ve written this:
Don’t love yourself
Your self feeds on love
will eat up all your love, insatiable.
Don't love yourself. It's a trap!
Love will die forever, entombed, self-consumed.
Your hungry-for-self-love self desiring nothing else , growing bloated until, until...
it releases emanations of death in an urban graveyard.
Of the self that loves
There will be nothing left.
STOP LOVING YOURSELF!
It's not the only way to be.
Look up. Look out.
In outer space, they say, no one can hear me scream
Because of the not-quite vacuum
Sound cannot travel there
Despite the plasma, the hydrogen, the dark energy.
Mal-adapted to outer space, we creatures of air
And carbon. Yet made since the first fire
Spurred on by cold war
To venture out there.
To outer space. The non-terrestrial
Contains us, and rocks condensed from gas
With molten cores.
So standing on the surface of Mars, for example, look out and see
Horizon. That line between the ground and the pink sky, another sky.
Beneath it lie valleys, mountains and caves. In another landscape
We see a topography both known and unknown.
And so having come so far, we find ourselves some way home.